combatting conditioning | saturn in gate 55 | march 8th, 2023 - january 25th, 2024*
Welcome to Combatting Conditioning, a brand new series from me, Jaclyn Michelle of interior creature.
Periodically, I'll be popping onto the blog to zoom in on a major gate transit and sharing some journal prompts for effective shadow work & deep de-conditioning.
Back in March, Saturn moved into Gate 55, The Gate of Spirit, which is ruled by Pisces and lives in the Solar Plexus Center. This gate asks us to get honest about our conditioned habits, patterns, beliefs, and behaviors around how we emotionally navigate relationships with others and the world around us.
Shadow Work/De-conditioning Questions to consider:
Which end of the fear frequency spectrum to you more frequently tend toward: victimhood or victimizer? Does this vary depending on the situation or relationship (in romantic relationships versus in familial relationships versus in friendships versus in professional settings)?
Saturn and Victimization: Saturn is the planet of tough love, and uses the languages of discomfort and contraction to empower us to see the areas of our lives where change is needed so that we’re on our most aligned, compassionate timeline. Saturn in Gate 55 wants us to explore a) how we feel our feelings, b) whether we use our feelings as opportunities for processing and insight or as weapons of war, and c) how we move from feelings of shame and blame to the more expansive, compassionate energies of ownership and creation. When we sit firmly in the seat of the victim, believing that everything happens TO us, it’s easy to inadvertently attract more relationships and situations that reinforce those feelings of victimhood. And when we sit firmly in the seat of victimizer, believing ourselves to be the only one with valid feelings, it’s easy to inadvertently attract more relationships and situations that bring us back into that role. Neither one of these extremes feels good in the body and, as Michael A. Singer so perfectly writes in his book The Untethered Soul, “No solution can possibly exist while you’re lost in the energy of a problem.” Saturn aims to disrupt this problem energy in order to catapult us emotionally into a place of solutions.
Victimhood: Read the quote above from Carl Jung. How does the above quote land with you? Think back to your childhood or teen years. How were emotional dynamics within various types of relationships modeled for you? Did you feel safe expressing your emotions within your relationships? Did this differ depending on the type of relationship? When things went wrong and problems and/or challenges arose, what were you told your role was within the challenge? Were you blamed for things that weren’t your fault? Were you told to repress your emotional response to these challenges or were you able to express your emotions freely? What messages did you receive about blame and fault within relationships? About the utility of feeling your feelings and processing your emotions? How did these early experiences of victimhood shape how you viewed yourself and your emotions? And how did these early experiences shape how you experience your emotions with relationships today?
Victimizer: Think back to your childhood or teen years. How were emotional dynamics within various types of relationships modeled for you? Did you feel safe expressing your emotions within your relationships? Did this differ depending on the type of relationship? When things went wrong and problems and/or challenges arose, what were you told your role was within the challenge? Were you held responsible for the emotions of others? Did you notice that the bigger your expressed emotions, the more you got your way? Or did others seem to get away with more when they expressed extreme emotions? What messages did you receive about how to safely express big, difficult emotions? How did these early experiences of wielding your emotions as weapons and/or experiencing your caregivers wielding emotions as weapons shape how you viewed yourself and your emotions? And how did these early experiences shape how you experience your emotions with relationships today?
Book recommendations for Saturn in Gate 55:
Are you finding this Combatting Conditioning series supportive? If so, watch this space! The first volume of my book The Rebuilding Year is dropping so soon and I cannot wait to tell you all about it!
In the meantime, thank you for nerding out with me 🤗
Do you have Gate 55 activated in your chart? How is this Saturn transit affecting you? If you’re in your Saturn Return, how has it been so far? Let me know in the comments!